In a move yesterday that shocked producers and humiliated movie critics, it was announced that the new "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows" movie, released early, was not in fact the real one.
"Say what?" said most excited moviegoers upon hearing the news.
"I don't know what did it," said Mr. John McCoy, who gave the police a tip-off which eventually led to the capture of the fake "Warner Bros. Studios". Said Mr. McCoy, "Like I said, I don't know what tipped me off when I was seeing the movie that this wasn't the real one. Maybe it was the fact that Voldemort was a guy in black jeans and a black t-shirt with white face-paint on. Maybe it was the fact that Hogwarts was a painted shoe-box. Whatever it was, something just said in my mind, 'this isn't the real one'. So naturally I ran off to tell the police."
Fake Warner Bros. were arrested on a charge of fraud, and the actual Studio received $1 billion dollars, plus all of the profits earned by their impersonator. Police are still investigating the magnitude of the scam, which would still cost millions in getting the movies in the theaters, even if the movie itself cost absolutely nothing.
Said one investigator, "We're still trying to figure out who funded the project. The fake Warner Bros. Studios had all of their bank accounts checked, credit cards' money limit tested, even had their houses checked for physical cash. No luck. We've mainly come to a conclusion that there are only two possibilities left. One, that this project was funded by an outside force with a lot of money at their disposal. This would explain the magnitude of the project, but that also means that the possibility of actually catching him is close to nil. The more favored conclusion is that this studio merely 'piggybacked' on the set theaters in which the actual movie was going to be released, so they just bumped the date up."
Criminal psychologist Dr. F. Roy Dean Shllippe stated at a press conference yesterday, "It was actually a very clever scam. Some people were very annoyed at the fact that the "Deathly Hallows" movie was going to be released in two parts, and so, when this 'movie' came out, the public didn't even stop to think how awfully convenient this was. Although the scam itself mostly gave itself away the minute the movie appeared on-screen, the planning was masterfully done. On a scale of one to ten, I'd give this a seven."