Wednesday, November 10, 2010

How very annoying. After interrogating all of Zweibel's household, I discovered that he apparently was rocketed off into the Andromeda Galaxy at the dawn of the new millennium. Dang it. Apparently he also left The Onion in the hands of Bernard Baruch and Aunt Jemima. Idiot. Everyone knows Quaker Oats mascots can't be trusted. Still, if it's off to the Andromeda Galaxy, then to the Andromeda Galaxy I will go. Did Zweibel really think that shooting off into space would save him? The gift of prophecy endowed by a bottle of 1923 Auld Ferrins will not save him! Nothing will! Ready my private rocket, Mr. Kane: Propaganda Central is going interstellar!

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